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All Souls Waccamaw Unitarian Universalist Church
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Our Trip to The Holy Land Spoiled by Gerard Ross
I got a text message one day
I opened it up to see what it did say
Said I was the winner of an expense paid trip
Two round trip tickets to the Gaza Strip
Said to my wife, "Well that sounds pretty good.
It'll probably be peaceful and holy like Trump said it would.
We can walk in the places where Jesus did.
We can follow his steps from the break of dawn.
Even visit Bethlehem where he was born."
So we boarded our flight on Trump Airway
Even the bag of peanuts bore his name I dare say
The flight was smooth and peaceful as can be
as we approached the Sea of Galilee.
I looked out the window on this sacred trip
and gazed upon Disney Gaza Strip!
I saw Donald's face on the Ferris wheel.
Well I guess this is part of the art of the deal.
I saw Mickey and Minnie as we continued to descend.
They were wearing hats saying "Make Palestine Great Again."
We touch down on Elon Musk International Field
All just part of the Grand Ole Deal!
We got off the plane in this place like a dream
Not one Palestinian was to be seen
They whooshed us in a car to our hotel we were gone!
There stood a statue of Trump with a Yamaka on!
In the lobby was a painting of the Last Supper as we toured
with Trump sitting at the head of the table instead of the Lord
Instead of the Apostles on his left and right
It was Stormy Daniels and Elon Musk what an unusual sight
Well I said you can only serve one master you know
We approached the Desk Clerk to check us in
He was dressed like a Roman Centurion
He told us the King Herod Luxury Suite was booked
So too was the Pilate Master King gone
He said though the Judas Iscariot Studio was vacant
for 30 pieces of bitcoin you can take it, No Refunds
It's a nice room with views of many
The window faces directly The Garden of Gethsemane
We open the door and guess what we saw
A bottle of Trump water down on the floor
just above was the Bible which was The Version According to Trump!
Later we stepped out on Trump Blvd. to explore
Every block had a toll booth if you wanted to walk more
We asked how much to the Via Dolorosa?
They told us a GPS was attached to your Toe-za!
We later went to the Church of the Holy Sepulchre
where the tomb of Jesus himself would be
We waited in line for hours to see
finally, we got into the room where Jesus was led
but we saw a copy of a birth certificate from Queens, NY instead
hanging next to an encasing of a bloody piece of ear.
Many a person was shedding a tear. OH MY!!!
When we got back to our room we saw
the invoice bill sitting on the floor
Itemizing a charge for our toilet bowl and more.
I opened the Bible to Revelations and it came to me
who the Anti-Christ is, it's clear to see
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https://www.theguardian.com/commentisfree/2025/jan/24/trump-fascism-what-to-do